Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
My ATM looks so different sober.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
