quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize