so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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