i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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