I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
He shit in the fireplace
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
