if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize