I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
