i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
