I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
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