In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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