if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
The power of my boobs compel you
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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