he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Randomize
