Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
