hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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