I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
