think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
