New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
