did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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