doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
