he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
