Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
