What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
