She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
All the doctor said was why
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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