the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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