do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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