1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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