Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
