I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
He felt like a one man threesome
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
