Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
this will be a night to untag.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
