I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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