we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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