He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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