It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Randomize