Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize