grandma shit on top of the toilet
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
