Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Randomize
