Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
