Where did you get a picture of my penis
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Randomize