That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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