Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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