Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
