he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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