Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
