I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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