my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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