WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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