I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
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