Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
