those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
