At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
